As I sat there this morning, head in hands, re-living every second of last night`s Night Terror`s, I am at a complete loss as what to do. You see, I have had my medication upped three times in the last four months, and yet the evil graphic night terrors still come. Some seem to last for hours, some for just a fleeting second. Are they image`s of times gone past? Or of a time still yet to come, who knows?
The problem is, where once I would wake screaming like a banshee, these days I seem to be so medicated I can`t come out of it! Now it seems as if I have to live my night terror right to the end whereas before I would wake with a jolt just before the worst bit happened!! The dreams/nightmares/night terrors or whatever you want to call them that relentlessly invade my slumber, and no matter what I try, there does seem to be no stopping them.
Sometimes I do manage to come out of them, fighting, kicking and screaming, and where once I would dread going to sleep because of this, sometimes now I find myself actually looking forward to coming out of them instead of being stuck in the void of unconsciousness until the bitter conclusion of the Night Terror!
And so it goes on, night after night, week after week. I cannot begin to tell you how it sometimes affects my day as I can have regular flashbacks during the day. Most people just automatically think as soon as they hear the words “Dementia”, they think of “Forgetfulness and Confusion”, little do they realise this awful illness has so many different threads to it. This is why I try to do my best to raise awareness and explain to people that it’s just not an age related disease and there are also so many different kinds of Dementia, Nightmares and Lewy body`s go hand in hand, along with the hallucinations. These are not so prominent in other dementia`s.
So, where do we go from here? Do I cut back on my medication (Exelon) and hope that I won’t start to decline mentally but will be able to wake up from my night terrors? Or do I just carry on the way I am going but still very worried that my night terrors will eventually spill over to the waking hours? What a choice!!
Sleeping tablets would only make things even worse! The thing is, these questions I am asking I have never seen asked, or answered in any medical books, I have never been sat down and told this and yet I have heard similar things so many times. Why does nobody explain this to you? Why doesn’t anybody give you the “Heads Up” that this might happen? Surely forewarned is forearmed without going overboard and frightening the living daylights out of anybody. Can’t somebody one day just sit those diagnosed down and explain the possibilities of what might happen?
My argument is, when you receive a box of (whatever) medication it may be and take out the paper with the instructions on it, on the back is a list of possible side effects a MILE LONG!!
WHATS THE DIFFERENCE!!!
I would love your views on this, thank you so much for reading this, hope it helps, love, Norrms, a very tired Elaine and family